Miss Me Yet?

Footprints… Treadmarks...

(Hat-tip to Ironic Catholic)

And it stoned me...

/queuing Van Morrison/

I kid you not. On the way into work I was listening to a news report on the radio about whether California should legalize marijuana use. And the reporter's name was... Alex Stone........... STONE!!!

/face palm/

Sometimes you just can't make things like this up. LOL

I want to join the Tautology Club!!!

This one made me chuckle this morning:

California History Lesson...

Got this via email from a friend:

A HISTORY LESSON

Do you know what happened back in 1850?  159 years ago California became a state.  The State had no money.   Almost everyone spoke Spanish.  There were gunfights in the streets.

So basically, it was just like it is today, except the women had real breasts and the men didn't hold hands.

Weekend Aftermath Cartoons...

A little humor via Flopping Aces:

Reality-check Humor...

(Hat-tip to the Caveman)

As a guy who works for a small business that will be negatively affected by an Obama Administration tax policy (and, thus, so will I), I found the following joke hilarious... that is, unless Obama actually wins.

Some guy upstate runs a small family-owned business who employs thirty people, and has already figured out that if Obama is elected, his taxes and cost-share of employee benefits will rise to such a point, that he'll have to let eight employees go.

Needless to say, this guy's sick to death over who gets canned. What to do... what to do?

So as he's walking through the employee parking lot, he sees eight different cars with Obama/Biden '08 bumper stickers.

Problem solved.

FYI: Suffice it to say, no one who works at the company where I'm employed is voting for The Obamessiah on Tuesday. NO ONE!

Wake up and smell the coffee, people!

Financial Humor...

In these financially depressing times Julie over at Happy Catholic gave me a good laugh this morning:

If you had purchased $1,000 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago, you would have $49 left.

With Fannie Mae, you would have $2.50 left.

With AIG you would have less than $15 left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drunk all the beer, then turned in the cans for aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214 cash.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.

To which Tom responds with a comment to her post:

Any portfolio should carry a reasonable amount of liquid investments.

Heh!

A New Musical Talent!!!!!

This brings tears to my eyes. It'll bring tears to your eyes, too.



Think... "Yoko meets Elmo".

And, just in case you thought it was fake, I give you this:

Sunday Funnies...

Said by my parish priest at the being on his homily this morning:

A nun was teaching her 2nd grade class the Bible story about Lot's wife who looked back and turned into a pillar of salt. Johnny raised his hand and said, "My mom once looked back while she was driving the car, and turned into a telephone pole."

Of "the Bomb", the "Nitally Lions", the "57 States", and other fun things...

(UPDATED)

The Obamessiah was near Penn State University, in which he praised the "Nitally Lions":


You know, the Nitally Lions of NPSU - New Penn State University - as in "New Pennsylvania":


Which is probably one of those "57 states" that he visited throughout the primaries:


It was in one of those extra states that he was able to "see" dead people, some of "our fallen heroes":


I'm sure they were the non-surviving survivors of "the bomb" that fell on Pearl Harbor. You know, "the bomb"... that one bomb?:


Then, of course, you have the 10,000 people who died in the Kansas tornado earlier this year:

Umm, Mr. Obama... actually, it was just 12 people who died.

Now, you must remember that The Obamessiah has been known to stretch the truth a bit. Like, when he stated that, “There was something stirring across the country because of what happened in Selma, Alabama, because some folks are willing to march across a bridge. So they got together and Barack Obama Jr. was born.”:

The problem, though, is that Obama was born in 1961. The Selma march took place in 1965.

But you must remember, too, that this is the guy who said, "I can no more disown [Rev. Wright] than I could disown the black community. I can no more disown him than I could disown my white grandmother." And then just 10 days later he does just that:


You'll notice that he suddenly is using a bunch of flags as a backdrop for that speech in Philadelphia, even though he had no problem disrespecting both flag and country by refusing to wear a flag lapel pin or to pledge allegiance to the flag during the primaries:


So, just remember that this is also the guy who claims that we simple people just "get bitter and they cling to guns or religion or antipathy towards people who aren't like them.":


And, of course, we all know his answer to the question, "At what point does a baby get human rights?":


Yes, yes... it's a mad world when someone who not only voted against but also actively fought against the Baby Born Alive Act is a viable nominee for President of the United States:




Bumper sticker can be purchased here (FYI: it's not me selling it.)

R.I.P. "In A World..."

Don LaFontaine, one of the all-time great movie trailer voice-over guys, past away (is that "past away" or "passed away"???) this week. In memory of the great Don, Ace has posted this YouTube clip. So, let me "invite you" to watch:

The Obamessiah Speaks! (humor)

This has been making the rounds today:



Heh-heh-heh...

Meanwhile, on to much more serious issues regarding The Obamessiah and abortion (hat-tip to RedState).

Is Cool Still Cool?...

From FanNation:

"Cool, the onetime giant of sports culture that had long been in declining health, died in seclusion last month. In a measure of how forgotten Cool had become, the moment of its passing went largely unnoticed even though the event was witnessed by millions on television, shortly after the Boston Celtics won the NBA championship by defeating the Los Angeles Lakers. In the ensuing celebration Celtics star Kevin Garnett was asked how he felt about winning the first title of his 13-year career. He threw his head back and bellowed, "Anything is possible!" as though he had just accomplished something previously thought to be beyond human capability, like walking on the sun or deciphering the plot of Lost. With Garnett's scream, Cool took its dying breath.

"Authorities say that Garnett will not be held responsible for the demise of Cool, ruling that he was no more culpable than thousands of other modern-day athletes who have an overwhelming need for self-congratulation and a tendency to overdramatize. Those athletes avoided Cool like a subpoena during its final years, instead embracing midair chest bumps, primal yells and the kind of elaborate, multistep hand jive that grade-school girls do on playgrounds..."

It concludes:

"Cool's condition was terminal... There will be no funeral service, which is how Cool would have wanted it. In lieu of flowers, mourners are asked simply to appreciate players who don't feel the need to punctuate every accomplishment with an over-the-top celebration, who understand the beauty in letting a performance speak for itself. That would be totally Cool."

To wit, I say... nah... "Cool" is still cool.

It’s roots go back to the 1920s Jazz-era. Cool’s got staying power because it’s cool to say it. Unlike “bad”, “rad”, “dope”, “gnarly”, “bitchin’”, “hip”, “ill”, "hot", “crunk”, “killer”, “fat”, “far out”, “dah bomb chizzle”, and the god-awful “groovy” which all are nothin’ but era-locked fads.

In the end... it’s all COOL.

(hehh)

A different kind of bilingualism (heh)...

Alive and Young posted an innocuous list of common words/phrases used by the fairer members of the human species.

I shall not comment (I ain't stupid, yah know).







*silently nodding my head*

Words that make you go, "Wha-???"

So... how come you always hear about someone being "undaunted"... but you never hear about someone being "daunted"?

Or someone being "unhinged".... but you don't hear about someone being "hinged".

People are always "unfettered", "unhinged" and "unscathed"... but what about the girl who's living her life "fettered, completely hinged, and has come away scathed"?

If you are not impervious to attacks... are you "pervious"?

If you are not implusive... are you "pulsive"?

If James Bond is not incommunicado... is he "communicado"?

If you don't make a presumption... is it a "sumption"?

And if someone does not receive an award posthumously... does he receive it "humously"?

What about a location that's not nondescript... does that mean it's "descript"?

And if you break away from convention... is it a "vention"? Or are you "proventional"... but that can't be right because you're against the convention, so I guess you would be "conconventional".

I don't want to approach this whole subject nonchalant... so, does that mean I'm "chalant"?

And, if you don't contradict this whole absurd post... would that mean that you're "tradict"?

And if it's not absurd... is it "surd"?


*sigh*... words that make me go, "Wha-???"

Ted Nugent sums it up perfectly...

I don't know if this is a legitimate quote, as it came via a friend through one of those email chains, but it's hilarious nonetheless. Ted Nugent is an no-nonsense, up-front, in-your-face, conservative, pro-2nd amendment bow-hunter. This just sounds oh-so Nuge:

Ted Nugent, rock star and avid bow hunter from Michigan, was being interviewed by a French journalist and animal rights activist.

The discussion came around to deer hunting.

The journalist asked, "What do you think is the last thought in the head of a deer before you shoot him? Is it, 'Are you my friend?' Or is it 'Are you the one who killed my brother?"

Nugent replied, "Deer aren't capable of that kind of thinking. All they care about is, 'What am I going to eat next, who am I going to screw next, and can I run fast enough to get away.' They are very much like the French."

The interview ended at that point...

I think I just got kicked in the pants...

Thanx, Julie D, for the wake-up call.

I don't have anything brand new to post just yet (including info from my time at the NAMM trade show last month). Until then, here's a little something I stumbled across a couple weeks ago (I can't remember from where... mayby Curt Jester.... maybe Ironic Catholic). Anyway, it made me chuckle.

The Seven Deadly Sins (in geometry form):



P.S. Oh, I do need to comment that the politics (and the musical cluelessness) is getting worse and worse at the Grammys. I lost all respect for the Academy when, back in the mid-80s, they gave the "Song of the Year" award (for best written song) to Bobby McFerrin for "Don't Worry, Be Happy." (a travesty to troubadours and tunesmiths everywhere) The Grammys have gone downhill fast since then. It was soon followed by Jethro Tull winning the first-ever "Best Heavy Metal Group" award. (???) Followed by Jewel winning for "Best New Artist" when her first CD was released over three years prior to her nomination. (!!!) Followed by Hillary Clinton winning for "Best Spoken Word Album." (#*&*@!) Followed by this year's winner in the same category, Jimmy Carter. (ugh!) Now the Dixie Chicks (I'm fighting the serious urge to substitute "Chicks" for the 4-letter s-word) win five awards. Lame... pathetic... and disheartening.