Saturday, October 07, 2006

An extremely quick series of reviews of seven films now out on DVD...

(1) The Pink Panther (with Steve Martin and Kevin Kline) --- has a few laugh-out-loud moments, but the flick falls flat too often. It's hard to live up to Peter Sellers classics, even if you're Steve Martin. The opening animation is the best part of the movie. I'd love for someone to put all of the opening credit animations from all of the Pink Panther films back-to-back for a nice 30-minute short! This one gets only 2 wine bottles out of 5.


(2) The Unfinished Life (with Robert Redford, Morgan Freeman and Jennifer Lopez) --- a nice drama, though a bit slow-paced. I get really tired, though, of Redford and Freeman playing the same exact characters they always play in every friggin' movie. And JLo can't act her way out of a paper bag. It's a decent family drama (with an ending that doesn't quite cover all the bases). This one gets a modest 3 wine bottles out of 5.


(3) The Inside Man (with Denzel Washington, Clive Owen and Jodie Foster) --- a decent thriller that keeps you guessing. It's a popcorn movie that's really not meant to be over-thought, 'cause you figure out the end of the film by listening to Owen's character at the very beginning of the film. It's a surprising turn for director Spike Lee, and for that I'll give this film 3 wine bottles out of 5. But you're average police department would have everyone behind bars without any problems. So, enjoy the popcorn.


(4) The Lost City (with Andy Garcia, Dustin Hoffman and Bill Murray) --- Garcia is the director and producer of this pet project set in Cuba in 1959 (just as the revolution was about to hit the island nation). The film is beautifully shot, with absolutely wonderful music throughout. The film is a little long (approx. 2-1/2 hours), but it's a glorious film that peels back the nearly 50-year facade of Castro's communist state. The documentary in the extras on the DVD is worth watching afterwards, as well. This Casablanca-esque film is worth a good 4 wine bottles out of 5.


(5) Mother Theresa (with Olivia Hussey) --- a wonderful film about the life and missionary work of Mother Theresa, portrayed incredibly by Olivia Hussey (of "Romeo & Juliet" fame). There are a couple points towards the end of the film that feels rushed, and it causes some confusion in the storyline. But, overall, it's a decent film about an extraordinary woman of profound spirituality. It's on par with the ABC mini-series on Pope John Paul II with portrayals by Cary Ewes and Jon Voight). Actually, both films mentioned here get 4 wine bottles out of 5.


(6) Three Buriels of Melquiades Estrada (with Tommy Lee Jones as lead actor and director, and Barry Pepper) --- The most convoluted, condescending, stupid, ill-written, poorly acted waste of 2+ hours of film in quite a few years. Set in modern day southwestern United States, where everyone is crude and immoral (except for the illegals coming across the border, of course). The film doesn't even make sense (such as when Jones' character takes a very long, roundabout way to cross the border into Mexico when he was originally only a couple minutes away from the border with plenty of lead-time to do so). Or when Pepper's character (whom Jones has been dragging across into Mexico) is completely passed out, then suddenly is wide awake when it's time to cross the river, then once they cross the river he's passed out again. Or when - in that same scene - the authorities have them cornered (with a helicopter, too) - yet suddenly they're able to cross the border unscathed in silence. Or when Pepper's character is bit by a poisonous snake and is hiding in a cave dying from his wound, but is suddenly found with ease and is later "cured" by poking a hot knife on the bite wound. Or the fact that the ONLY person throughout the entire film to be able to smell the decaying corpse of Melquiades Estrada (aside from Pepper's character) is a blind man in the outback. No one - and I mean NO ONE - else smells the corpse. This film is so bad (with a blatant pro-illegal immigration agenda, despite its surreal ending) that I rate it with one-half of one glass of “corked” (spoiled) wine. I’d have rather sipped from a glass of vinegar. In a word... bad. Jennifer Lopez’ “Gigli” bad.... Mariah Carey’s “Glitter” bad. Stupid and bad!!! But what do you expect from Al Gore's college roommate?


(7) Three Times (foreign film out of Taiwan, with subtitles) --- three wonderful stories about various aspects of love (requited and unrequited), set in three different eras in Taiwan: a pool hall in 1966; a brothel in 1911, and a contemporary setting in 2005. This film moves very, very slowly. But it's enticing with its call for patience from the viewer while showing a lack of urgency from its characters in a trio of vignettes. If you like Kirosawa's "Dreams", then you'll like this film. I give it 3-1/2 wine bottles out of five.

No comments: