Monday, June 19, 2006

A Personal Spiritual Journey (Part 6 of 8)...

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Upon entering the Lower Church you are faced with massively thick white marble columns, supporting a low ceiling, and along the back wall are the crypts for those cloistered nuns who eventually pass from this life and enter the glory of Heaven. Only two or three of the order have been laid to rest at this point in time.

Brother Leo (one of the Franciscan brothers) was asked on a moments’ notice to fill in for another brother to give a talk to a group of people on their pilgrimage retreat. These talks are open to anyone who enters the church and are not exclusive to the small groups attending. And in his half-impromptu/half-prepared presentation, Brother Leo said some profound things.

He started off with a whimsical hypothesis of what Heaven must be like. Or more specifically, what would we be like in Heaven. He gleaned from scripture the images of Jesus after his resurrection. He was able to suddenly appear to His disciples who were cowering in a locked room, so we may be able to walk through walls. Jesus ate fish with His disciples, so we may be able to eat as well. We would be able to move at the speed of thought, at one moment being in one place, then immediately appearing somewhere else far away. In considering the transfigured body of Christ, we would be filled with bright white light. And, of course, as scripture states, “[there will be] no more pain, or tears, or suffering, or death.” (Revelation 21:4)

St. Francis de Sales, in his Lenten Sermons, comments further that we will be able to “see, hear, consider, [and] understand more perfectly” when we reach the glory of Heaven. That we will be able to recognize those whom we’ve never met while here in this life, and that we will “know each other by name.” That our level of awareness and the “power” and “harmony of [our] actions [will be] perfected with divine consolation.”

“All is perfected and brought to perfection in the eternal beatitude of Heaven.” ~ Lenten Sermons of St. Francis de Sales (pgs 54, 57)


But, until then, we are left on this earth - where we tend to strangle ourselves with countless anxieties. Then Bro. Leo quoted the passage from Matthew that I read earlier in which Jesus says to “not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’… [and] therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Brother Leo went on to say, “The more you complain, the more you need to thank God for all of the little things.” That “everything you have is a gift from God.” Your eyes, your hands, your ears, yourself, your life, your family, your job, everything. Even your pains and disappointments.

“I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.” ~ Psalm 3:5


Bro. Leo continued, “The past is gone… The future is not yet here... You only have the present… Be in the moment.” For there is “a reason for being where you are at, whether [that reason is] for you, or for someone else.”

How quickly we complain about a certain trial someone may be going through, or shake our heads at some injustice witnessed from a distance, or rationalize an abomination all in the name of convenience. Or we cry out to God wondering why we’re continuing to go through whatever trial we’re facing at the moment. And, in doing so, we blind ourselves to the possibility that through our own struggles someone else may finally open themselves up to God’s grace. Or when we witness someone elses struggles we obscure ourselves from the very parts of our own nature God is wanting us to confront and challenge and change.

Bro. Leo instructs, “Humble yourself.” And “think of Jesus as a good friend.” And your house as your heart. Brother Leo relayed the imagery of Jesus standing at a door, and the handle to that door is only on your side. So waits for you to open the door to your heart and to be invited in. And, even when you do let Him in, Jesus (like any gracious guest) “will only go into the rooms of your house in which you invite Him.”

Will you invite Him into your living room where the TV is? Your kitchen & dining room where you prepare and eat your meals? Your bedroom? Your telephone? Your computer? Your basement or attic? Your closets? And, of course, we have many closets, don’t we?

Brother Leo continued, “A person wounded is afraid to love. Afraid to be wounded again.” And it’s that person who needs to learn to forgive. “The things we bury inside and don’t want to talk about are the areas where Jesus wants to enter, and to heal, and to comfort.” It pleases Him “when you seek forgiveness” from Him, as well as when you yourself forgive others. “Pray for the person who did you harm, and pray for yourself to be able to forgive.” And pray to be forgiven yourself.

And then Brother Leo said this: “There is joy in the midst of suffering.” When you are in pain, suffering, anxious or depressed… it is then that Jesus is closest to you. It is at that moment that "Jesus is kissing you." And you may ask, “How could that be? My wife is seriously ill. My husband has left me. My child was killed in the prime of his life. I’m struggling to pay the bills. I’m overwhelmed with my job. I’ve been betrayed. I’m so lonely. I’m depressed and filled with despair. How could it be that Jesus is kissing me when it hurts so much?”

The reason why it hurts so much is because at those moments “Jesus is kissing you while still wearing His crown of thorns.” And I think back to the display just outside the door to the lower church. And the gnarled and twisted crown of shockingly thick yet needle-sharp finger-length thorns. And the wounds of suffering He endured for all of humanity.

And an image flashed in my mind of Jesus carrying the cross on His back. And that wooden cross was me. That very cross onto which He was nailed… was me… and you… and you… and you. Christ nailed with spikes onto the tree of our sins. And we are intimately and permanently embraced by his love and grace and mercy in His suffering and death.

Brother Leo said, “Unite you pains to the cross. Unify yourself to Jesus. Purify your life. [And] Grow in holiness.”

“In becoming man, He has taken our likeness and given us His.” ~ Lenten Sermons of St. Francis de Sales (pg 91)


Brother Leo ended his talk with these words: “Your Guardian Angels are protecting you, even if you don’t know it.”

“Some have entertained angels unawares.” ~ Hebrews 13:2

“For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.” ~ Psalm 91:11


In speaking on when we reach Heaven, St. Francis de Sales said, “There our good angels will give us greater joy than we can imagine when we recognize them and they speak to us so lovingly of the care they had for our salvation during our mortal life.”


After taking some time to ponder and reflect on Bro. Leo’s comments, I and the others on pilgrimage began to make our way up to the Main Church.
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